Switching Partners

Sara B. 02/06

Dana Scully sat across from her date smiling at whatever it was the man was prattling on about.  She’d stopped listening about five minutes earlier when he’d mentioned the super human abilities of his former girlfriend for the sixth or seventh time.  From what she’d been able to gather the woman was a perfect combination of Madam Currie, Gandhi, Eleanor Roosevelt (with out the overbite) and a never ending list of humanitarians and peacemakers.  She was brilliant, witty, kind, giving, challenging, devilishly fun and had a body that would make Pamela Anderson jealous, but natural of course.  Of course, she thought, and she snuck a peek at her less than overzealous breasts.  She glanced at the packed dance floor.  The floor seemed filled with people happy to be with each other while she sat at the sidelines with a man pining for his lost fiancé.  Fiancé, where did that come from?  Had he said that?  “Excuse me, but did you say fiancé?”

“Yes, we were engaged for seven months.  The wedding was supposed to be in April.”

“Oh, okay.  Sorry for the interruption.”  Mike started rambling on exactly where he’d left off; it was as if she hadn’t interrupted; this guy was well rehearsed.  Dana watched the couples dance.

~X~

Fox Mulder could not believe this woman; two solid hours listening about the charms of her former fiancé.  The man must be a God among men and could give Cary Grant a run for the money in the looks and class department.  Catherine had kept going on and on about him.  Why the hell did they ever break up? 

Mulder couldn’t listen to any more praises of the beloved Michael.  “Care to dance?”  He blurted it out during the few seconds she needed to take a breath before continuing her conversation.  He figured at least on the dance floor she just might give it a rest; he was wrong.  They were only on the floor for a moment when he heard her say that whatever the band was playing was Michael’s favorite song.  Michael’s favorite song being played in Michael’s favorite restaurant; oh joy, Mulder grumbled to himself.  The memory of the song brought on another round of ‘he’s so wonderful’.

“Cat!”  Mulder and Catherine ceased their dance.  They were standing next to a table; the man stood and was drinking Catherine in with his eyes. 

“Michael!”  Catherine replied breathlessly.

The next thing Mulder knew Catherine and Michael were dancing and he was left standing next to a lovely red head, obviously Michael’s forgotten date.  “May I?”  He motioned toward the vacated chair.

“Just tell me there is no lost lamented former fiancé in your past.” 

Mulder laughed; apparently she’d been subjected to the other side of the coin he’d endured all evening.  “Only a former marriage and that was only lamentable while it lasted.  Fox Mulder,” he added as he took the seat.  “Now tell me you don’t have some story about the most wonderful man on the face of the earth you’re just dying to tell me about.”

“At this moment, you are the most wonderful man on the face of the earth just because you are not him.  Thank you for rescuing me from the ‘Cat was so perfect’ fan club.  Dana Scully.”  She replied and held out her hand and pointed toward the couple.  “Would you be honest with me?”  Mulder nodded and she continued.  “Now, does she really have a body that Pam Anderson would be envious of?”  Mulder couldn’t help himself from laughing.

“Not even close.  I would have to say that even though Catherine is beautiful, your date may have been looking at her through the eyes of love, not reality.  The way she described him I thought he was a young Mel Gibson, Tony Curtis, Cary Grant and George Clooney rolled up in one tasty package.”

They sat and watched their dates for a few moments.  The couple never took their eyes off each other.  “Do you think they’ll invite us to the wedding?”  Mulder queried.

“I doubt that they even remember we exist.  What would you say if I suggested we leave the lovers to their mutual admiration society and maybe take a walk or something?”  Dana offered.  

~X~

“So you prefer to be called by your last name?  I admit Fox is unusual but is that so bad?”

“How would you feel if you went through school being called Foxy Loxy or always hearing things like sly like a fox?  Believe me all the jokes get really old fast.”

“I suppose it’s like red hair,” she said quietly.

“What?”  He didn’t follow her logic.

“Did you ever know any redheads growing up?”  Mulder shook his head.  “There is an old taunt ‘red, red - red on the head, I’d rather be dead than red on the head’.  Also somewhere along the line redheads got the reputation for being a little loose.  Now in the case of my sister there was a kernel of truth to it but in my case. . .  Suffice it to say I rarely got another date after saying no.”

“Gotcha, sometimes it’s amazing anyone survives to become an adult.”

They walked along the Mall in a companionable silence that neither felt the need to break with idle small talk.  They ended up sitting on a bench in front of the water watching the moonlight play on the ripples.

Mulder suddenly chuckled. “What, what is it?”  Dana asked smiling.

“I was just thinking that this is the best date I’ve been on since my divorce and we aren’t even supposed to be together.” 

She joined him in the merriment.  “Do you believe those two?  I had to tune him out just to protect my ego.  He went on for ten minutes on her eyes alone.”

“I forced her to the dance floor just because I was sure the only subject she hadn’t covered was his prowess in bed.  A guy could get a complex, you know.”  Mulder moved a little closer to her.  “And you have nothing to worry about in the ‘eye’ department.”  He winked at her then sobered up.  “It worked out okay, wouldn’t you agree?”  There was a tinge of hesitancy in his voice.

Dana smiled a little broader and placed her hand on his.  “Okay doesn’t do it justice for how okay it is.”

~X~

One Year Later:

She walked in with the mail.  “Well, that’s the last box; I guess I’ll be going,” he said grumpily.  She didn’t say anything but continued sorting the mail. 

They’d moved in together nine months earlier but things hadn’t worked out.  Thinking back he wondered what the hell had they been thinking.  They were so different and really had nothing in common.  He looked at her and shook his head.  There was nothing, absolutely nothing about her that he found attractive. 

She continued to separate their mail in an effort to avoid falling into yet another argument.  She still couldn’t believe what an unbelievable ass he was.  God, would he just leave already?  She looked up from her task and he was still there watching her.  Jeeze, why couldn’t he control that hair?  And that nose, yikes.  Why wouldn’t he just pick up the damned box and leave? 

She resumed sorting and came upon an envelope addressed to the two of them in an elegant calligraphy script.  It was an invitation.  She remembered the man clearly and had a vague picture of a woman.  She handed the invite to him for him to read.  It took a moment till the circumstances of the date came back to her.

“You gonna go?” He asked and she shook her head, she was in no mood to suffer someone else’s happiness.

 You are cordially invited to celebrate the marriage of Dana K. Scully to Fox W. Mulder on the Fifth day of . . . 

End